Have you ever had those days when you are sitting at your desk and all you can think about is escaping that dreadful, mundane, ass-dragging, 9 to 5 – or 6 – or 7, piece of shit Tuesday? When knock off time seems to be coming about as fast as a five-year olds piss poor attempt to send a bowling ball down the lane. Slowly – bouncing – off – the left bumper, then the right bumper, then the left bumper, until it comes to a standstill, just two feet from the pins. When you have exhausted all of the yahoo headlines, Facebook updates, and the fake money in your online poker account. When the very thought of doing something productive makes you want to be physically ill and yet you can´t seem to find ANYTHING to entertain yourself on the internet (or have been banned from ping-pong until after 5pm).
When all you want to do is drop everything and go to a beautiful beach, enjoy weather that wraps itself around you like a warm blanket on a cold night, stick your feet in the equally warm but refreshing water, and enjoy a cocktail that is sweet to the taste but packing a Mike Tyson punch of alcohol.
You may not realize it at the time, but there is a high percentage chance that you are day dreaming about Brazil.
Unfortunately our time in Brazil went faster than an apple through my digestive system when I had giardia. It seems like just yesterday we were getting smacked around by the mosquitoes in the
Pantanal like a coked out whore that stole money from her pimp. Clearly our time in
Rio dominated our thoughts and hearts when it came to Brazil. But Ilha Grande did beat out all other beaches we visited in Brazil to claim the
“BS – WANKERSS Beach Award” (Bret/Sally Way Awesome Nice Killer Entertaining Relaxing Sand and Surf – Beach Award) We know that when we make it down to the southern America again, Brazil will be on our list of places we visit.
Food:
To the most dedicated carnivore that wants nothing more than to die choking on a bloody piece of meat and it just so happens that Brazil bids quite well as a very practical place for such an act to happen. The Brazilian style BBQ (Churrasco) is a wonderfully scripted ballet. The protagonist role being yourself, the antagonist your stomach and its painful, cramping, beyond stuffed, emergency signal it so pathetically attempts to send to your brain. The waiters smile as they pile more and more varieties of meat on your plate. Gleefully increasing their pace as they see you being beat into submission.
The guys on the street are serving up what many of us refer to as Kabobs of meat and based on quality and quantity would be dished out for well over $20 in the states. However you’re going to be able to catch these bad boys on just about every corner (at night) for $2 – $4.
Top Rated For The Trip:
Clearly as the introduction paragraph stated; Rio is by far at the top of our list for Brazil and thus far top rated for our trip over all. Lopes Mendes beach in Ilha Grande is one of the best beaches either of us have ever been to in our life.
Items Lost:
Our sense of budgeting and self-restraint (Our budgeting to this point has been exceptional. Brazil. . . 24% over what we intended to spend)
Items Acquired:
Tablet (Died in Colombia)
*Big shout out to Glen “Pops” Armstrong for taking out the second mortgage on the house to send both of those items to Brazil!
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Hey Bret and Sally,
I am ditching Wet Grey Seattle in April for 3 weeks in Brazil. I am using your blog for itinerary ideas since I have no idea what I am going to do there right now.
Thanks for the scouting it out for me
Don Miller
Sounds awesome Don! Shoot us an email if you have any specific questions.